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Again, dating is primarily pursuit, not preparation. Like other experiences in life, dating will prepare and mature us in one way or another, but we don’t date in order to prepare ourselves for someone else.

God prepares us for marriage in a thousand other ways that are not spring-loaded with the risks, obstacles, and difficulties of dating.

Godly wisdom is a wide stream, and God’s word often allows us to apply his heart and wisdom in remarkably different ways, even in dating. It came in many forms, but it goes something like this: So, I started paying tuition, registered for classes, purchased the textbooks, jumped into relationship after relationship, and never looked back — until I wanted my money back.

My problem was that I subtly treated each new relationship — each marriage — like a mini-marriage. The men or women we date are not a series of lab experiments that prepare us to be a better husband or wife.

If you want to prepare yourself for your future husband or wife, you need to learn how to practice these five graces in marriage: Does that sound like the dating scene we see today? It does not sound, look, or smell like most of my dating experience.

That’s mainly because Ephesians –33 was written about with our spouse.

But we don’t prepare ourselves for true, lifelong romance by experimenting with lesser, short-term romance.

Instead of “studying” for marriage by only giving ourselves away to other lovesick single people, we give ourselves to observing real-life, faithful, and happy husbands and wives.Instead of making out in the basement or watching more chick flicks, we could find creative ways to help families we want to learn from.I am to date in order to get married, at least in the West. I’m just not convinced dating is necessarily preparing us — heart, habits, character — for marriage.If we want to be as happy as humanly possible in marriage, we practice loving others like he loves us. When we say “exclusive” today, we typically mean one person at a time. For instance, someone could have been divorced five times and still be “exclusively” dating someone today.And the ways we prepare ourselves to love like him will look very different from every other trend in dating. I think we can all agree that is a shallow and superficial way to think about exclusivity.The relationships are real relationships, and the people are (most likely) someone else’s future husband or wife.